Quietude

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I can feel its smoothness and presence.

It is as if everything’s at peace.

The air, light and smooth, as it ever have been, socializes all around my room. Her presence makes me smile unconsciously.

I try to regain my senses but a sharp light sun beam in her stealth magic taps my eye. My eye didn’t behave less than what a touch-me-not plant will.

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I tuck my head underneath a pillow, a desire effort to run away from its power.

My pillow is not resistant to the chirp the pigeons are making while sitting right next to the window sill. My unconsciousness dreams of a summer morning like this. The bed slipping next to a window ledge where I hear the birds chatter all day especially during dawn and dusk. It symbolizes a fresh and pure start. The window opens a wide view to the surrounded mustard farms. The pretty small yellow petals shines all around, blossoming life. The wind makes them dangle as if aspiring me to dance to their tones.

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I grin on this thought. Opening my eyes to a look at the plants on my window edge wagging with the gust of air, spell a magic. These few minutes are not just less than a blessing, I confess this to own self.

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In an instant, my phone pops a notification. A good morning text adds the charm to my Sunday Morning.

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Come,Let’s fall in Love :)

Fall in love with my early morning shabby hairdos,

Fall in love with the way I tie my hair in a bun,

Fall in love with the way I dress or undress,

Fall in love with my unacquaintance on things,

Fall in love with the areas I work upon,

Fall in love with the different energies I have,

This time,

Fall in love with all of ME.

 

Fall in love with the times I remember my broken moments,

Fall in love with the crazy things I do,

Fall in love with my ideas that doesn’t make any sense to you.

Fall in love with the times where all I do is speak,

Fall in love when I say it’s my time to listen to you.

This time,

Fall in love with all I am and want to be.

 

Fall in love with the times I don’t know the way out,

Fall in love with how I mess up things,

Fall in love with the times I ask for forgiveness,

Fall in love with the times I confess my anger,

Fall in love with the way my mood swings but my desire slays,

This time,

 Fall in love with my falling.

 

Fall in love with the times I have fallen in love,

This time,

Fall in love with the way, I knew you would.

 

Fall in love with the reason behind my choices,

Fall in love with the idea of impatience,

Fall in love with the way I let myself down,

This time,

Fall in love with my breakdowns and unlearning

Because I know I might fall again,

But,

This time,

I know I will stand stronger than I ever was.

 

Healer

As the sun reaches its summit, the world becomes a quiet place. People say being quiet is the most powerful weapon. Hence it’s the most powerful time of the day-Sunny quiet powerful afternoon.

Been here for 3 hours without a spoken word, a breeze of happy memory shines my life. I could inhale the soft smell of merry memories. I tried to recall the moments but I could only remember my feelings.

It was not a fresh feeling but was an ecstatically tired one coming through a long way back to me.

I let them go hoping they will come again when I ask them to. They were my very own healer.

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Let’s meet in the middle #ExperienceAtTeachForIndia

Teach For India, a 2 year challenging experience and an effective learning one as well.

I chose TFI over my previous work because that’s what I wanted to do. The passion of teaching, belief in equity, love for kids and eagerness to create are all the factors that drew me to the fellowship.

This experience made me dive into the education system more carefully and helped me to understand how every child has the capability to attain his or her potential if given a right direction.

My first year started with a hustle but fortunately ended with teaching my 5th grade learners. The one thing that I notice every day when I visit school is their eagerness to learn. Their zest to learn is so high that it pushes my keenness to teach every single day.

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“You do not teach by teaching- you teach by loving”. These are the only kind words I aim to shout out at the end of my fellowship and to gladly confess that I believed and lived by it.

Learning, it’s different for everybody as their life experience is. My class is full of unique learners. I remember Mustafa. He once came with his sister at a PTM and she scolded him for not telling her anything I convey to him about his studies or why he never studies at home. The little boy didn’t utter a word to his sister but when I asked him about English or Classroom culture, he was thorough with it. I told her sister to give him another chance and I know he will improve a lot. From that day till today Mustafa always raises his hand whenever I pop a question in class. This made me wonder about the shy ones in class who are all longing for attention and kindness in and outside class. It’s their zeal to learn that attracted kindness which acted as a medium to achieve what they want. He was the only one who made a highest jump in RC(Reading Comprehension) level score till date (0.2 to 1.5).

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Ahmed, he is the epitome of enthusiasm of my class. Sometimes I feel my only job is to make him sit, but Ahmed learns the most when he is energetic. Ask him anything when he is all charged up, he will not just deliver the right answer but will transmit his energy to you and to the whole class.

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One day I saw Shalini crying so hard in class and could not stop cursing Ahmed because of his mischievous behavior in class. I told her to calm down till I talk to Ahmed but she abruptly uttered that her previous class teacher would straighten Ahmed by beating him at this behavior. I was taken aback and told her no matter what I won’t hit him but yes I will make him understand the effect of his behavior on everybody as well as on him. After my talk with Ahmed, I tried to explain Shalini why hitting/beating is not the solution of the problem. Not sure that this 10 year old will understand “MY Why” behind it, but still I kept up my hope and explained her. Throughout the day I wondered are these kids taking this gentleness in the right way or am I doing it the wrong way. My doubts headed up until next day as soon as I entered the class Shalini came up to me and said, “I am really sorry Keertika didi,I shouldn’t have said that. I know I was wrong.” Her self-realization matters the most to me.

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Failures are the building blocks of my counted success. I find the community, Govandi, not just challenging but difficult. Yes, it’s full of issues that I never imagined was a part of life. I believed scarcity of the three basic parameters (Food, Clothes and House) lead to all the problems in this world, but being in this community for these months made me realize that the lack of belief in LOVE is the real issue.

I learnt that learning is not bounded or controlled. My failures guide me towards my learnings and my challenges to be consistent with my learning amid all my daily struggles pushes me each day.

 

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For me, this journey started with being kind and calm with them. One thing at a time.

During the journey I watch them discuss, debate, cry, express support and love, and then the belief that these kids are capable of just about anything, rises prominently.

 

There are great teachers all around the world. Do read what she is doing in her class:

Courtesy:  Glennon Doyle Melton #ThankYou

http://momastery.com/blog/2014/01/30/share-schools/

 

Ek saal

Ek saal, kuch din, bahut lamhe aur itne lafz bhi woh seema thaak na sake.

Woh gehra samundar, woh shaant shadke,

Aaj bhi uss jagah ka ehsaas hai.

Yaad kuch toh tha,

Shayad bhool hum sab gaye.

 

Anjani raahe humesha se achi lagi,

Dheeme dheeme hum bhi chal pade,

Sundar ek lafz tha,

Gehra uska astitva tha.

Har raah ki ek anokhi kahani,

Har likhawat kuch keh rahi thi.

sun

Suraj ki kiran jab mili uske bhav se,

Chamak utha woh maano uske ehsaas se.

Uski hawa mein jaadu tha,

Uski aawaz mein nasha.

 

Dosto na samjho toh jao ek anokhe jagha,

Kuch nahi toh ehsaas lao,

Hume bhi yaad kuch toh tha,

Shayad bhool hum sab gaye

Wohi din the anookhe seedhe uljhe 🙂

Dilemma

As quiet as a tranquil sky,

As still as a statue,

He rolled under the pillow covers undisturbed,

Lay there waited for my attention.

 

He wanted to convey what the world was up to,

Or to know how irresistible can I be?

He, who knew all my undeliberate thoughts and actions,

Without judgments, without fear,

Under his secrecy,

I was secure.

 

A travel companion,

A sleep partner,

A partial memory,

And my hiding place.

 

More than a connect,

Less than an addiction,

Is there somewhere

In a hiding place so hidden to me.

 

 

 

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A Reminder

Long lone walk along the sea shore,

Disturb and unanswered wanders about,

Stops awhile to look at the weary sunset,

Wrangle around with sands and stones,

LIFE wonders her meaning of existence too.

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For she is held accountable for all the setbacks,

All the wrapped happiness goes unnoticed,

Whereas all the misfortunes are plunged on to her.

‘How can you change your life? ’This life is not worth’, or

‘What can you do with your life?’ fascinates LIFE.

How everyone in the whole world is trying to manipulate her,

Change her for what she might not want to be.

She began to question the almighty about her purpose?

 

Soon she got hit by a football,

She turns around to a toddler asking for his football,

SHE blessed by the sight,

And the utter realization that a part of her resides in the toddler too, delights her.

 

Little steps ahead,

She witnesses a first kiss,

A phone call from an old friend,

And an uncontrollable laughter

She smiles and keeps walking.

Not satisfied with her reaction,

Supreme decides to shower the blessings onto her,

Soon a downpour at the sea shore gazes everyone presence,

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Dancing in the airy rainbow, she shouted,

“I love this LIFE”

May be just like people,

LIFE too sometimes needs a reminder.